2/16 - Forgiveness etc


As with any completion tool, the essential ingredient is your willingness to be complete. If you are unwilling to use this tool to move through your emotions to a place of responsibility and completion, the tool will not make a difference. So, ask yourself, “Am I willing to be complete with this person and/or situation?” before starting. Completion is an inside job. From Essence, we get complete and then we get in communication from a space of completion. We do not need the other person to do or say something different in order to cause our completion. The three-letter series provides access to completion when there is some emotional energy present for the client. The opportunity is to express all the upset, to take responsibility, and to get back to Being. Do these letters in order. We don’t suggest you leave much time between them. Write these letters as if you were writing directly to the other person (i.e., “Dear …”).

NOTE: DO NOT send these letters. DO NOT leave them out where anyone can find them. DO NOT use these letters to communicate anything to anyone. These letters are for your process only. Write them and then destroy them.

Letter Number l: Emotions Letter:

In this letter, let it fly. Get out all the emotion around this issue: anger, blame, disappointment, sadness, joy, despair, etc., that is there. Feel free to be as much of a victim as you can. Don’t be nice or transformed. Really let them have it. Continue to write until it is ALL out. At the end, it should seem like there’s nothing left to say. If the upset is not fully expressed in this letter, it will be difficult to do the next two letters in a way that makes a difference.

Letter Number 2: Responsibility:

In this letter, share what you can be responsible for. Note what you did and didn’t do that had it go this way. Really look on your side of the street. What did I do/say/not do, etc. that had things turn out this way. Include in this letter anything you see to apologize for. {Note: If this letter is short or seems challenging to write, go back to Letter Number 1…there is likely more to say there.}

Letter Number 3: Acknowledgement:

In the last letter, acknowledge the person. Even if it is challenging, please be intentional about doing this step completely. You can let them know what you are grateful for about who they are, what they have done, and what they are committed to. You can thank them for the difference they have made in your life or the lives of others. You can acknowledge them for doing the best they can with what they have. Whatever acknowledgement is authentic for you, share it in this letter. {NOTE: Again, if this letter seems challenging, go back and add more to Letter Number 1.}